Liquid Sunshine

I worked on the yard today and I pretended like it was gonna be mine for a long time.  If I was doing it like it was only mine for 6 more months I might not have worked as hard.  And I guess that's what I have to keep doing.  

Silas is now doing some physical and speech therapy. He has some minor delays in both areas but it's nothing that can't be fixed with a bit of help.  He's brilliant though and amazes me daily with how he processes, and he loves numbers.  He's counting to 100 and adding/subtracting all sorts of number combinations.  I wanted to get this looked at before we left.  Right now we are covered under the state and it's free.  I don't know what it's gonna be like when we get to Kauai or if they will even have a program like this.  He did great this morning and even though he didn't want to leave the house to go, he was very supportive of being there because he knew that he would get coco from the little stand in the lobby...it makes all the difference.

The corner I'm currently walking around is to live these next 6 months like its all that's left .  So I'll slow it down and pack in all I can fit.  I'll try.
The plan is to look at the weather on Mondays and make plans accordingly.  It's kinda like someone tells you that you have 6 months to live so you better start working on that bucket list. 
This bucket list is pretty short though.    
        1. Spend as much time with
those I love as much as I possibly can.

                      That's it...

I think that's what I should have been doing the whole time but maybe didn't realize it.  Life has a way of creeping up on you and being more then you expected.  Or less..depends on what's at stake.  My hope is that I'll be changed by all that I've been shown.  I guess I have an opportunity here to embrace and grow.  Being His guest here in this story I will try to just go with the corner and enjoy this part of the chapter.

You know what's scary about this?  I don't want to be forgotten.  That might sound selfish...but it's so true.  They know my quirks and weaknesses, they appreciate my strengths.  I'm not a big ? mark.  I know that life will keep moving as I turn this corner and I'll so wanna be back in "this" story.  I'll be on to a new story with new people.  Honestly I spent most of my life wanting to feel known and had no idea how to make it happen.  My failed attempts brought such disappointing results.   And then it happened.  I stopped watching my back and looking over my shoulder, I put my guard down.
A girl I know asked me if it was possible that there could be someone there who needed me and I needed them. "Don't want it"...I said.  But she's right.  She has to be.  And I hear in a quiet wisper..."It's ok little girl, I got it.  There's something ahead you can't possibly imagine.  It's gonna all work out."  SO hold on heart...here we go!





Then there's Zeke. 
He's liquid sunshine...didn't know it was possible to have liquid sunshine but it is.
It's right here...